Dementia Friendly Christmas: 9 Ways to Plan a Calm Day

A dementia friendly Christmas is a shorter, quieter and more familiar version of the usual festivities, planned around the person’s routine and energy rather than the calendar. Spread visitors out, keep meals and bedtimes at normal times, set aside a quiet room and keep a plan B. Small, familiar traditions usually work better than a full day of change.

At a glance

• Keep the day low-key: familiar routines, familiar places and a flexible plan B.
• Ask family and friends to visit in turn rather than all at once, and set up a quiet room.
• Bring in decorations gradually, serve simple food and avoid overloading plates.
• Dementia UK Admiral Nurse line 0800 888 6678 is free; Alzheimer’s Society Dementia Support Line 0333 150 3456 is charged at the standard local rate.
• If behaviour changes suddenly, contact the GP to rule out a medical cause.

Why can Christmas be hard for someone with dementia?

Christmas combines several things that people living with dementia often find difficult: unusual noise, crowds, changes to the home, disrupted meals and a long, tiring day. Alzheimer’s Society advises keeping the day low-key and sticking to familiar routines, with meals at regular times and in familiar surroundings.

Each person is different. Dementia UK stresses taking the lead from the person, adjusting activities to their stage of dementia and watching for signs of enjoyment even if they cannot say so. The ideas below are a menu to choose from, not a checklist to complete.

Nine ways to plan a calm, dementia friendly Christmas

1. Protect the routine. Keep meals, medication, rest and bedtime close to normal. Having Christmas dinner at lunchtime may suit if the person is most alert earlier in the day, and a short gathering is often easier than a long one.
2. Stagger the visitors. Many guests at once can overwhelm. Ask relatives and friends to come at different times across the festive period, and agree among the family who visits when.
3. Brief people before they arrive. Ask visitors to say who they are when they arrive, and prepare children with simple, honest explanations. Tell everyone not to take it personally if the person behaves differently or does not recognise them, and to avoid correcting them.
4. Create a quiet space. Set aside a room away from the television, music and chatter. Headphones with favourite music can help block out noise, and familiar carols played at a gentle volume can help the person feel included.
5. Introduce decorations slowly. Put them up over several days rather than all at once, and let the person help with small jobs such as hanging a bauble. A familiar old wreath can be comforting even if it is not recognised.
6. Keep food simple. Do not overload the plate, offer finger foods if cutlery is difficult, and use plates that contrast with the tablecloth so food is easier to see. If the person refuses food, offer it again later. Tastes and appetite can change, and a simple meal on the day is perfectly acceptable.
7. Be careful with drink. Dementia UK notes that alcohol can reduce how well medication works and can add to confusion, drowsiness and the risk of a fall. Check with the GP or pharmacist, and keep alcohol-free options on the table. Our guide to dehydration in older people explains why regular drinks matter.
8. Choose gifts and activities that suit. Dementia UK’s Admiral Nurses suggest a cosy item of clothing, such as a soft jumper or shawl, or a simple photo collage to look at each day. Activities such as singing familiar songs, looking through photographs, simple card games or Christmas crafts can involve the person at their own pace. Our guide to reminiscence therapy covers memory-based activities, though some memories can be upsetting, so follow the person’s lead.
9. Keep a plan B. Be ready to shorten the day, cancel a trip or move the meal. A calm day that ends early is better than a full programme that ends in distress.

How do you handle late afternoon restlessness?

Some people become anxious or want to “go home” in the late afternoon or evening. Some carers on Alzheimer’s Society’s forum say it starts between 2pm and 4pm and lasts until bedtime, often called sundowning. That is exactly when Christmas Day is at its busiest, with the meal cleared away and the house full.

Individual carers report that familiar music, calm reassurance or a drive helped, while explaining that it is too dark or cold did not work for one carer. What helps varies from person to person, so follow their lead. Plan a quieter spell for that time of day and see our guide to sundowning in dementia for more detail.

What if the person lives in a care home?

Ask the home early about its Christmas plans, including visiting times and any limits on group size, and agree as a family who will visit and when. If visits are restricted, dropping presents off earlier in the week can help. Your legal position on visiting is covered in our guide to care home visiting rights.

Some families feel guilty that a relative will not be at the family table. Dementia UK’s helpline advice for this situation is to consider a small, quiet celebration at the home, using favourite songs, films or photos, and to check what the home is already planning. If you do plan to take the person out for the day, speak to the home beforehand about medication, meals and the return time, and see days out and holidays from a care home. A short visit, hosted at home and finished before the late afternoon, is often easier than a long one.

What if you are travelling or hosting?

Hosting at home avoids long journeys and keeps the person among familiar things. If you do travel, Alzheimer’s Society suggests allowing time to recover afterwards, keeping routines for meals, bedtime and medication, and packing familiar items such as a favourite mug, pillowcase or memory aids. Ask for a room with a connected bathroom if staying away, and make sure toilets are easy to find at any venue.

What should you do if the person becomes distressed?

• Stay calm, lower the noise and move to the quiet room, giving the person time and space to rest.
• Do not correct or argue. Dementia UK advises focusing on reassurance and belonging if the person does not recognise someone.
• Check for overlooked causes such as thirst, constipation or pain. A sudden change in behaviour is a reason to contact the GP to rule out a medical cause, and Alzheimer’s Society gives similar advice after trips away. Our guides to delirium and urine infections and aggression and agitation in dementia explain what to look for.
• If anyone is in immediate danger, call 999.

Where can carers get support over Christmas?

Looking after your own wellbeing matters too. Our guide to Christmas stress for carers covers coping, and the helplines below can talk through a specific problem.

Hours can change over the festive period, so check the charity’s website before relying on a particular day. A carer’s assessment from the council can also consider breaks, and respite care may help after the holiday.

Frequently asked questions

How can I make Christmas calmer for someone with dementia?

Keep the day short and predictable. Stick to usual meal and rest times, space visitors across several days, decorate gradually and provide a quiet room. Have a plan B ready so you can change course without fuss if the person becomes tired or unsettled.

Should I tell visitors about the person’s dementia before they come?

Yes. Briefing family in advance, especially children, helps avoid awkward moments. Ask visitors to introduce themselves, speak calmly, avoid correcting the person and not to take any unusual behaviour personally. Simple, honest explanations work well for children.

What gifts suit a person with dementia?

Practical, familiar and easy-to-use gifts work best. Dementia UK’s Admiral Nurses suggest soft, cosy clothing and a simple photo collage. Alzheimer’s Society lists large-print calendars, simple puzzles, music players and easy-to-use kettles among its ideas.

Can someone with dementia drink alcohol at Christmas?

Ask the GP or pharmacist first. Dementia UK advises that alcohol can lessen the effect of medication and increase confusion, drowsiness and the risk of falls. Alcohol-free or low-alcohol alternatives let the person join the toast safely.

What if the person does not recognise me?

Try not to correct them. Dementia UK advises focusing on reassurance and belonging, preparing other family members in advance, and reminding them that the person still knows they are loved and special. Looking through photographs together can help.

Where to get help next

For day-to-day tips, read our guides to caring for someone with dementia and communication tips, or find local peer support through dementia support groups in the UK. If Christmas has made you question whether care at home is still working, our care search and funding checker can help you look at options.

Sources

• Alzheimer’s Society: How to support a person with dementia at Christmas
• Dementia UK: Christmas activities for people living with dementia
• Dementia UK: Heard on the Helpline during the festive period
• Dementia UK: Admiral Nurse Dementia Helpline
• Alzheimer’s Society: Holidays and dementia
• Alzheimer’s Society: Dementia Support Line

Reviewed by The Care Panel team on 9 November 2026. This guide is general information about care in England, not legal, medical or financial advice. Rules and rates change; check with your council or an adviser before making decisions.